Hollywood Good

A Brakpan girl walks into the local dry cleaners.
She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says.
"Come again?" says the half deaf worker.
"No" she replies. "This time it's mayonnaise."
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A Brakpan girl was involved in a serious crash.
The paramedics arrive and drag the girl out of the car till she's lying flat out on the road.
Medic: "OK, I'm going to check if you're concussed."
Brakpan: "Ok."
Medic: "How many fingers am I putting up?"
Brakpan: "Oh my god I'm paralysed from the waist down!"
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Brakpan girl goes to Home Affairs to register for child benefit.
"How many children?" asks the assessor?
"Ten" replies the Brakpan girl,
"Ten?" says the Home Affairs worker.
"What are their names?"
"Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren, Warren and Warren"
"Doesn't that get confusing?"
"Naah..." says the Brakpan girl. "Its great because if they are out playing in the street I just have to
shout Warren, YOUR SUPPER'S READY or Warren GO TO BED NOW and they all do it..."
"What if you want to speak to one individually?" says the perturbed Home Affairs worker.
"That's easy," says the Brakpan girl... "I just use their surnames"
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A Brakpan girl goes into a sex shop & asks for a vibrator.
The man says: "Choose one from our range on the wall."
She says "I'll take the red one."
The man replies: "You can't, that's a fire extinguisher."